How Discouragement Takes Effect (Motivational Discussion)

When you are motivating yourself to reach success, it is common to experience tons of discouraging moments. Sometimes these hindrances take everything away from you. It ruins your ability to think correctly. It wears you down up to the point that you can no longer function, and it makes you feel worthless. There is something about it that crawls up in you, which you can never explain. There is this feeling of ungratefulness that you begin to have without thinking about the good stuff. It becomes the number one problem in terms of achieving your goals in life.

“Regardless of the source of discouragement, it is there and the once great project is no longer getting any of your attention.” – Christine Hammond, LMHC. 

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Discouragement And Its Effects

The problem with discouragement is the buildup of self-loathing attitude. When you often feel that you are not good enough and that the things you do seem unappreciated, you tend to lose control over your purpose in life. Discouragement takes your confidence away and changes it to something you are not supposed to have. It becomes an excuse for not wanting and trying your best. It becomes a reason for quitting. It causes anxiety and depression. It becomes anything you can imagine negatively. It never allows you to progress. In the worst cases, it makes you think that there is nothing good in you.

You know when discouragement takes effect when you tend to lose interest in doing the things you used to love. There are passion and motivation that drift away together with your reason for aiming for success. Sometimes the transition is not that evident, though. But after an extended period, discouragement becomes a thing you only choose to have.

Discouragement And Mental Health

The significant purpose of discouragement in your life is to make you lose your mindfulness. That is because it can ruin your brain functions. Therefore, your actions, habits, and even personality change when this particular thing hits you. You may not seem to understand why it does affect you that much. But to explain it further, it is all because of its damage to your target areas, especially your emotions. According to Leslie Becker-Phelps, Ph.D., “One common way to help yourself is to think of times when you were in a good place. When failure discourages you, think of when you’ve succeeded. When depression makes you despair, think of when you were happy. By itself, this can be difficult to do. But you can do it.”

Yes, discouragement is meant to sabotage your emotional stability, where it pushes the adverse effects to ruin your mental health. It shifts your focus to those unnecessary things only. You get angry for little reasons. You get frustrated by not handling matters well. You feel unloved. You become less motivated to achieve anything. All that stuff that makes you hate life and more.

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Takeaway

Discouragements are always part of your every journey. It is not something you can shrug off anytime you want because it sticks like hell. But you have to remember that it will never define who you are. It will not make sense when you know you are working and trying your best in everything you do. Discouragements mean nothing when you learn to use it to your advantage. When you look at it differently, it might become a motivating tool for you to go on. So let it stays with you. But, never allow it to eat you up.

Donna M. White, LMHC, encourages us through these lines: “So when the times get tough, don’t get discouraged and don’t feel defeated. Hold your head up, stick your chest out and find your inner strength to forge forward.”

 

Good Leadership – Psychologists Can Help

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Leaders are often stereotyped as people who remain in the frontlines, doling out orders to their subordinates while enjoying the profits reaped by the organization he leads. However, a true leader is far from this stereotype. True leaders care about the people underneath and around them. They are skilled in inspiring and motivating their respective teams. They don’t care much about the profits; what they care about is the welfare of their team and how they can utilize the abilities of their team members without burning them out too much. (They even have psychologists to help them out with their mental state, which then makes them even great leaders!)

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The Dark Side Of Leadership (As Told By A Therapist)

We all know that there are different ways to describe a leader. There are times that these people are worthy of their position when it comes to handling others. However, there are those whose behaviors are way too problematic. That is why we often refer to a particular situation, people, and the working environment as toxic. There is destructive, derailed, and aversive leadership. With the existence of this toxicity in the workplace, there is a tendency that we might suffer from mental breakdown due to pressure and anxiety. So with that, we need to understand how leaders showcase the dark side of leadership. Let’s hear it from a therapist’s point of view.

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Toxic Leadership

Dr. Marcia Lynn Whicker says, “The repertoire of toxic leaders covers a broad spectrum; it depends more not only on what they really are but also on how people perceive them.”

The repeated and systematic behavior of leaders, managers, or supervisors that violates the legitimate interest of the people and its organization is unhealthy. That is because toxic leadership is capable of undermining and sabotaging the organizations, goals, resources, and tasks. It destroys motivation, effectiveness, well-being, job satisfaction of the people involved in a more excellent production. Toxic leadership often results in consequences such as uncooperative subordinates, unresolved work-related issues, unprofessional working environment, and unhealthy contributions not only to the organization but to its surrounding people as well.

The most significant misconception about leadership is its power and entitlement. Not all leaders see it as a privilege. They often envision it as something that puts them on a pedestal. It becomes a price that must soon pay off. And when it gets to the wrong individuals, it ruins the idea of serving the majority of employee’s interests. It begins to state a position where responsibilities get disregard. “Toxic leaders frequently take all the credit for their team’s success and their employees’ good work,” says Andrew Schmidt, Ph.D. “They blame employees for mistakes and deflect responsibility for errors.”

Self-Deception

Leaders are responsible for taking care of significant decisions in the company or organization. They are the ones that cater and push for solutions in addressing current problems concerning the people’s duty and responsibility. That also includes the overall relationship of people to the workplace. However, part of the job is for leaders to master self-deception. It talks more about the destruction of the view of reality. It becomes present when leaders are unwilling to look and consider themselves as the problem.

“Self-deception at the most basic level is an inability to be honest with yourself. Self-deception is either believing things that are not true, and trying to fool yourself into believing things that are not true.” – Dr. Cortney Warren, clinical psychologist. 

  • Not believing something that is true

Leaders in the self-deceptive state worry more about themselves rather than bring front an interest in others. They are often stuck with personal issues as a whole.

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One primary source of toxic leadership is the idea of achieving an unrealistic goal. Usually, these types of leaders struggle to get employees to work productively. They quickly get frustrated when things don’t go their way. In most circumstances, these individuals’ waste time, energy, and techniques, because they believe that employees are to blame in the organization’s incapability to deliver quality results. That even if talented employees leave the company, it’s the employees’ fault. These leaders look at employees as lazy, incapable, and unreliable people.

Leaders with self-deception issue think they are hard working individuals and that they are great and all. They believe they are fair and working fine with others. They have this self-entitlement of doing what they want. That’s the reason why they don’t think that the company and the people’s productivity has something to do with how they handle them. They are not aware that the employees’ problems are stemming from their toxic leadership style.

The Unhealthy Attitude

Leaders are often demanding. Perhaps that’s because they believe they know everything. Most of them think that their position is the representation of status and intellectual hierarchy. Honestly, most leaders don’t consider following their instructions. They have this mentality that employees should be at the bottom because they don’t have as much experience as they do. That even though employees work hard and diligently, they won’t make it because they don’t share the same work ethics to become successful just like them. They don’t realize that individuals respond to attitude and not through constant demands.

Most leaders who are in the unbreakable position are the ones who don’t know when to put themselves accountable for something. These individuals often feel the need for justification. Yes, some of them sometimes apologize for rude and unnecessary behavior. But not all of them are capable of changing their ways toward their employees.

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Leadership comes with significant responsibilities in helping, motivating, and caring for people’s physical, emotional, and mental health. It is not something that ruins other persons’ overall wellness.

Things You Can’t Do If You Want To Become A Millionaire

It is not bad to admit your desire of becoming a millionaire to help your family and yourself. Everyone dreams of being able to buy whatever they want without checking the price tag. Hard-working people also look forward to the day when they can wake up without thinking of how to make money.

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This wish tends to intensify when you get a taste of luxury at least once in this lifetime. You cannot sleep at night without thinking of what life’s like as a wealthy person. You want to keep on buying lottery tickets or strive to get a promotion, hoping that either will take you a step closer to becoming a millionaire.

Although no one will judge you for having this desire, you should remember that doing is better than dreaming. Some individuals are born with money – that is true – but many did not grow up in a lavish home or even went to Ivy League schools. They used to be regular citizens like you, to be honest. The only difference perhaps is that these folks did not do the following things that can prevent you from being wealthy.

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1. Saving Up To Save

It is easy to remember our parents from childhood telling us to spend a little portion of our daily school allowance so that we can buy whatever we want even if it’s not Christmas. However, when the kids become adults and should various responsibilities, most of us tend to forget this ideology and keep the hard-earned dollars stagnant in the bank.

The reason why it’s not advisable to save up merely for saving is that the value of money lessens over time. You need to use it to be able to multiply it. Otherwise, it will be hard to obtain your millions.

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2. Showing Off

A typical millennial receives their paycheck, goes to the mall, and exits it with expensive products. They look rich, yes, but that’s nothing but a facade. More often than not, they are only left with a small budget for food, housing, and transportation.

This habitual buying of wants – not needs – is what you should avoid if you are set to make your first million. Don’t worry if a colleague has flashier possessions than you do. It’s wiser to think of your future instead of showing off at present.

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3. Taking Loans For Basic Reasons

Infomercials from banks are excellent at encouraging people to take out a loan to buy their dream car or house. The requirements and terms they set seem reasonable as well. Thus, many people grab the opportunity, thinking that it’s the answer to their problems.

The reality, however, is that this idea does not fly if your goal is to have seven figures – or more – in your bank account. That is especially true once you agree to pay a loan within 15 years or so since it then comes with a high-interest rate. The only time that it’s acceptable to borrow cash from any source is when you want to use the money for business and other investments.

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4. Not Working Enough

We have seen employees of various ranks vacate their workplace and go home straight after their eight-hour duty is over. Some go out for drinks with colleagues while complaining about their exhausting day.

The thing is, there are also folks who hardly act in that manner. They sometimes stay in the office until midnight to finish projects or proposals that will allow them to expand their wealth. If that’s not possible, they bring their work at home.

Between the two types of employees mentioned above, the latter represents the individuals who are more likely to turn into a millionaire than anyone else. Not only do they avoid spending on unnecessary things, but they also try to be productive even during their free time.

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5. Lacking Investments

Money is an essential commodity that never sleeps, yet yours may run out at the blink of your eye if you do not think of investing it. You see, making investments give you the chance to increase your funds regardless if you are lounging at the house or on a family vacation. You won’t have to work for money anymore since it will work for you.

Considering it will be your first time to fund something, you may start with buying stocks or shares in various companies. You can open a business too or look for new inventions to support.

Final Thoughts

The key to becoming a millionaire is within reach once you learn to avoid the things discussed above. We know that some of them may be far from what your parents used to tell you. However, you ought to believe that keeping your money stagnant in the bank is not always the solution.

Stay away from shortcuts, remember your roots, and always keep your hopes and intelligence up. Good luck!

Why Is Humility An Essential Quality Of A Leader

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Being on top is not about having the power to manipulate those beneath you.  It’s an opportunity to look after them, provide them with guidance, help them improve themselves, so they, too, may get up to where you are if they want to.

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