Leaders are often stereotyped as people who remain in the frontlines, doling out orders to their subordinates while enjoying the profits reaped by the organization he leads. However, a true leader is far from this stereotype. True leaders care about the people underneath and around them. They are skilled in inspiring and motivating their respective teams. They don’t care much about the profits; what they care about is the welfare of their team and how they can utilize the abilities of their team members without burning them out too much. (They even have psychologists to help them out with their mental state, which then makes them even great leaders!)
We all know that there are different ways to describe a leader. There are times that these people are worthy of their position when it comes to handling others. However, there are those whose behaviors are way too problematic. That is why we often refer to a particular situation, people, and the working environment as toxic. There is destructive, derailed, and aversive leadership. With the existence of this toxicity in the workplace, there is a tendency that we might suffer from mental breakdown due to pressure and anxiety. So with that, we need to understand how leaders showcase the dark side of leadership. Let’s hear it from a therapist’s point of view.
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Toxic Leadership
Dr. Marcia Lynn Whicker says, “The repertoire of toxic leaders covers a broad spectrum; it depends more not only on what they really are but also on how people perceive them.”
The repeated and systematic behavior of leaders, managers, or supervisors that violates the legitimate interest of the people and its organization is unhealthy. That is because toxic leadership is capable of undermining and sabotaging the organizations, goals, resources, and tasks. It destroys motivation, effectiveness, well-being, job satisfaction of the people involved in a more excellent production. Toxic leadership often results in consequences such as uncooperative subordinates, unresolved work-related issues, unprofessional working environment, and unhealthy contributions not only to the organization but to its surrounding people as well.
The most significant misconception about leadership is its power and entitlement. Not all leaders see it as a privilege. They often envision it as something that puts them on a pedestal. It becomes a price that must soon pay off. And when it gets to the wrong individuals, it ruins the idea of serving the majority of employee’s interests. It begins to state a position where responsibilities get disregard. “Toxic leaders frequently take all the credit for their team’s success and their employees’ good work,” says Andrew Schmidt, Ph.D. “They blame employees for mistakes and deflect responsibility for errors.”
Self-Deception
Leaders are responsible for taking care of significant decisions in the company or organization. They are the ones that cater and push for solutions in addressing current problems concerning the people’s duty and responsibility. That also includes the overall relationship of people to the workplace. However, part of the job is for leaders to master self-deception. It talks more about the destruction of the view of reality. It becomes present when leaders are unwilling to look and consider themselves as the problem.
“Self-deception at the most basic level is an inability to be honest with yourself. Self-deception is either believing things that are not true, and trying to fool yourself into believing things that are not true.” – Dr. Cortney Warren, clinical psychologist.
Not believing something that is true
Leaders in the self-deceptive state worry more about themselves rather than bring front an interest in others. They are often stuck with personal issues as a whole.
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One primary source of toxic leadership is the idea of achieving an unrealistic goal. Usually, these types of leaders struggle to get employees to work productively. They quickly get frustrated when things don’t go their way. In most circumstances, these individuals’ waste time, energy, and techniques, because they believe that employees are to blame in the organization’s incapability to deliver quality results. That even if talented employees leave the company, it’s the employees’ fault. These leaders look at employees as lazy, incapable, and unreliable people.
Leaders with self-deception issue think they are hard working individuals and that they are great and all. They believe they are fair and working fine with others. They have this self-entitlement of doing what they want. That’s the reason why they don’t think that the company and the people’s productivity has something to do with how they handle them. They are not aware that the employees’ problems are stemming from their toxic leadership style.
The Unhealthy Attitude
Leaders are often demanding. Perhaps that’s because they believe they know everything. Most of them think that their position is the representation of status and intellectual hierarchy. Honestly, most leaders don’t consider following their instructions. They have this mentality that employees should be at the bottom because they don’t have as much experience as they do. That even though employees work hard and diligently, they won’t make it because they don’t share the same work ethics to become successful just like them. They don’t realize that individuals respond to attitude and not through constant demands.
Most leaders who are in the unbreakable position are the ones who don’t know when to put themselves accountable for something. These individuals often feel the need for justification. Yes, some of them sometimes apologize for rude and unnecessary behavior. But not all of them are capable of changing their ways toward their employees.
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Leadership comes with significant responsibilities in helping, motivating, and caring for people’s physical, emotional, and mental health. It is not something that ruins other persons’ overall wellness.
It is not bad to admit your desire of becoming a millionaire to help your family and yourself. Everyone dreams of being able to buy whatever they want without checking the price tag. Hard-working people also look forward to the day when they can wake up without thinking of how to make money.
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This wish tends to intensify when you get a taste of luxury at least once in this lifetime. You cannot sleep at night without thinking of what life’s like as a wealthy person. You want to keep on buying lottery tickets or strive to get a promotion, hoping that either will take you a step closer to becoming a millionaire.
Although no one will judge you for having this desire, you should remember that doing is better than dreaming. Some individuals are born with money – that is true – but many did not grow up in a lavish home or even went to Ivy League schools. They used to be regular citizens like you, to be honest. The only difference perhaps is that these folks did not do the following things that can prevent you from being wealthy.
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1. Saving Up To Save
It is easy to remember our parents from childhood telling us to spend a little portion of our daily school allowance so that we can buy whatever we want even if it’s not Christmas. However, when the kids become adults and should various responsibilities, most of us tend to forget this ideology and keep the hard-earned dollars stagnant in the bank.
The reason why it’s not advisable to save up merely for saving is that the value of money lessens over time. You need to use it to be able to multiply it. Otherwise, it will be hard to obtain your millions.
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2. Showing Off
A typical millennial receives their paycheck, goes to the mall, and exits it with expensive products. They look rich, yes, but that’s nothing but a facade. More often than not, they are only left with a small budget for food, housing, and transportation.
This habitual buying of wants – not needs – is what you should avoid if you are set to make your first million. Don’t worry if a colleague has flashier possessions than you do. It’s wiser to think of your future instead of showing off at present.
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3. Taking Loans For Basic Reasons
Infomercials from banks are excellent at encouraging people to take out a loan to buy their dream car or house. The requirements and terms they set seem reasonable as well. Thus, many people grab the opportunity, thinking that it’s the answer to their problems.
The reality, however, is that this idea does not fly if your goal is to have seven figures – or more – in your bank account. That is especially true once you agree to pay a loan within 15 years or so since it then comes with a high-interest rate. The only time that it’s acceptable to borrow cash from any source is when you want to use the money for business and other investments.
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4. Not Working Enough
We have seen employees of various ranks vacate their workplace and go home straight after their eight-hour duty is over. Some go out for drinks with colleagues while complaining about their exhausting day.
The thing is, there are also folks who hardly act in that manner. They sometimes stay in the office until midnight to finish projects or proposals that will allow them to expand their wealth. If that’s not possible, they bring their work at home.
Between the two types of employees mentioned above, the latter represents the individuals who are more likely to turn into a millionaire than anyone else. Not only do they avoid spending on unnecessary things, but they also try to be productive even during their free time.
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5. Lacking Investments
Money is an essential commodity that never sleeps, yet yours may run out at the blink of your eye if you do not think of investing it. You see, making investments give you the chance to increase your funds regardless if you are lounging at the house or on a family vacation. You won’t have to work for money anymore since it will work for you.
Considering it will be your first time to fund something, you may start with buying stocks or shares in various companies. You can open a business too or look for new inventions to support.
Final Thoughts
The key to becoming a millionaire is within reach once you learn to avoid the things discussed above. We know that some of them may be far from what your parents used to tell you. However, you ought to believe that keeping your money stagnant in the bank is not always the solution.
Stay away from shortcuts, remember your roots, and always keep your hopes and intelligence up. Good luck!
Being on top is not about having the power to manipulate those beneath you. It’s an opportunity to look after them, provide them with guidance, help them improve themselves, so they, too, may get up to where you are if they want to.
There are two types of persons that you can look up to when you want to motivate yourself regarding achieving success. There are the leader and the boss. Both of them share the same quality of providing you with inspiration and motivation to work hard diligently. However, though these two seem to have common traits, they are both different in their approach. One of them may create a lasting positive impact on your life, and the other one may leave you with nothing but trauma. So let’s try to differentiate the things about a leader and a boss.
Karol Wasylyshyn Psy.D. explains the different types of bosses. “Those with Remarkable bosses could soar. Those with Perilous bosses could stop personalizing their bosses’ relentless criticism and dissatisfaction. Those with Toxic bosses could acquire coping strategies and/or figure out a way out of their miserable reporting relationships.”
Encouragement
The fine line between encouraging and dominating is visible in a person in a higher position. When it comes to pushing people to work, a boss always makes sure that he’s in charge. He drives his constituents and doesn’t allow them to commit mistakes. A boss installs fear and anguish to his people. On the other hand, a leader is someone who coaches his people. He doesn’t leave them not until he believes they are ready for whatever task there is. A leader’s essential character is his ability to generate enthusiast within his group.
Amy C. Edmondson, Ph.D. says, “This tool is deceptively simple and deceptively powerful. A question plainly conveys, “I am interested in what you have to say.” In asking it, you have created a moment of psychological safety that helps others offer their own thinking.”
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Rules
Though both leader and boss share the same power of being on top, one makes an exemption. A boss depends on authority. Everything about his rules is subjected to complete implications. There’s no room for mistakes and unquestionably no time for disagreements. His words are the only thing that matters.
Meanwhile, a leader becomes different because he depends on goodwill. He listens to his people and allows them to contribute to something that is useful and beneficial for the whole team. He appreciates everyone’s skills, talents, and mental capabilities.
According to Kevin Bennett, Ph.D., “Effective leaders are needed who can build teams that result in measurable actions. This might mean that people disagree with each other along the way, but the effective leader realizes that can be a healthy part of the process.”
Focus
As much as we love to work without a boss or a leader, things are never the same without them. Concerning focus, a boss believes in “I” while a leader thought of “we.” When “I” is given emphasis, a boss becomes the single functioning brain of the whole team. Therefore, everything becomes all about him. But here’s the twist. When a boss fails, it’s his people’s fault. But when he succeeds, it’s only because of his effort. A leader differs because he becomes one of the team. There’s no boundary as to what he and his team are about to achieve. There are fairness and equality for all.
Effort
When it comes to diligent work, a boss is always functional. Not because he repeatedly do the task over and over, but because he knows everything about it. He depends on knowledge-based facts and distributes it to his constituents for functional purposes. From there, he ensures commitment with a little less effort. A leader, on the other hand, is sometimes incapable of doing anything. However, his ability to partake in the task makes him stand out. A leader attempts to do the job and shows his people how things could be done.
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Social Interaction
People are incapable of living alone so there’s no hard work that a person can’t manage when he’s with his team. However, the mentality of how people should be taken care of differs in both a boss’s and a leader’s way. Boss uses people to work for him without any concerns and social attachment. The connection is only between employer and worker, and nothing more, nothing less.
Contrary to what a leader does, he makes a connection. He develops a person’s ability and skills for future endeavor. A leader takes time to imprint something to his members so that they can fully become the persons they have to be.
Both a leader and a boss affect a person’s overall social, emotional, and mental development. They play a significant role in their lives. So if there’s a chance you’ll be at the top position, make sure to choose become a leader instead of focusing on being a boss.
